OTK rambling and analyzing.

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OTK rambling and analyzing.OTK thoughts…those nasty old spankings…I was chatting with someone the other night and we were discussing spanking. Not game playing but real life, old fashioned, punishment. I grew up being punished, the k**s around me were punished and some housewives were too. Hell, my first actual boyfriend gave me my first two or three spankings; outside of the family. I remember my mother getting a few trips to the ‘woodshed’. I’m well aware that I can be a brat and a bitch; it’s in the genes, that and not always paying attention to life around me. Some of my lovers put up with me – some put me over their knee. I thought about things a lot – after the chat was over – that other guy who analyzed me in chat. In every case I could think of – including the one I posted last week – my guys would give me ‘old fashioned’ discipline. Not a game but for real things I’d fucked-up in some way. Instead of a punch on the nose or a kick in the backside; I got it as an errant girl friend or wife would…bare-bottomed and OTK. I know the guy cared for me; maybe more than I cared for him and he wouldn’t do any lasting damage. Especially to that little ass he liked to fuck so much.Most of the guys, who disciplined me, were about the same. Strict loving and fair. When Bobbie fucked up, she was punished to fit the ‘crime’.All of the good guys were also older; some as much as twenty years older. Jack, my dear Jack, was one of them. It didn’t slow him down much; he was still very good in bed, adventurous, fun to be with, good company and strict. After that first night we met in the ABS; I think it was the second actual ‘date’, he set a few ground rules. In the end he said, “I just want you to understand that, if it’s necessary, I will punish canlı bahis you.” That sort of sent a little chill through me. I was forty-eight at the time, hadn’t had anyone blister my backside in maybe six or eight years. Now I’m in a relationship – with a ‘father’ figure – thinking that I’m not too old for punishment. I agreed to it and life went on; frankly I don’t think I even thought about what might happen. I brought home a speeding ticket, not a small one, Jack wasn’t happy. After everything was cleaned up after dinner; we went to the living room for a long talk. In the end, I’d be given a spanking in two sessions…it was a lecture. I’d be spanked in the next few days.For the next few days Jack was horny as hell, very attentive and almost doting. The first spanking was hard for both of us. I put up a struggle and became very loud; it wasn’t the worst ever but, I DID have a very sore backside. After it was over Jack comforted me; we sat huddled together until he stood me in the corner. I struggled during the second session, about thirty minutes later. I made a big thing of it and the spanking lasted longer. We cuddled in bed and things went out of control real fast (‘daddy syndrome?’) Jack was completely aroused and I wanted suddenly to please him, to say I was sorry. I was sore from end to end and my ass was on fire and throbbing like hell. Sore backside and all, I rolled on my tummy and let ‘daddy’ try and fuck my brains out. I think that was the night I fell in love with him, McClintok style? My father could have done that anytime he felt like it…he never felt like it.Jack did it that night in spades. It was painful as hell [with my sore ass] but, I think I had fallen in love just then, I knew that the man cared for me a lot. bahis siteleri I struggled a little the third time then just stopped. From then on I’d obey him, just like a girl should. There were other feelings that I still can’t describe.This was a guy that you could fall in love with, marry and have many babies with! The kind of a girl I wanted to be. Jack wasn’t abusive, just strict, a sore backside, once in a while, wasn’t anything big. I realized that his problem was ‘me’, same as it’s always been. With everything I had going, I vowed to settle down and make this work, no matter what. I already loved him.In thinking back, I am pretty sure that I did ask to be spanked, a few times. There was a very strange feeling about doing that. Maybe I was fighting my submissive side? It also seemed very comforting and loving when he gave me those spankings. Then he’d take me to bed and **** me. It was one of the times all I could think about was, ‘oh god…I wish I could get knocked-up to this guy!’ I really did wish that I could; god, did I want that.He wasn’t rich but Jack was very well fixed; I tried to work even harder at being everything that I wanted to be. I let go of a lot and worked at what Jack wanted me to be…all his. I worked even harder at the one thing that I wasn’t…female…I wanted to look good for him whenever we went out. In my way, I wanted him to be proud of me, I was his bitch. Both of the guys are right. So…both of the guys are right. I was also becoming totally submissive in my role of, wanting to be barefoot and pregnant. He had me quit my job after a while. He started giving me a monthly ‘allowance’ but also paid for everything. We had started to talk about my moving in with him but the [grown] c***dren were a problem. bahis şirketleri We continued to live apart [only about five miles] but dated, went places, quite a bit. There were quite a few mornings that I woke up in his bed; he called it ‘our’ bed. We became complete lovers. Yes, I became totally submissive, a regular Donna Reid but a whore in bed. I realize all of this now. Until I was in my late forties, I went through what can only be described as PMS. I was ‘out there’ for almost a week every month. You could almost mark the calendar, between the fifth and the tenth, every month. Jack was as understanding as any sane man could be. In the beginning he’d wear himself out trying to calm me down or get me up…my mood swings were a real bitch for a few days. In the end it was a spanking, some corner time and then love.Sometimes there was a paddle.I was looking for ‘daddy’, I was looking for security and, I was looking for love. To me ‘love’ equated to spanking, I wanted my father to fuck me but he never did. Even though discipline played a part in this relationship, it was a connection to my past. Jack had become ‘daddy’ in all ways. As for getting my backside spanked; I guess that was daddy spanking me then, taking me to bed and screwing my brains out. Pain is sometimes also love.Jack told me that he loved me, in the back seat of his Buick, about a year later. It wasn’t what he said, honey, it was the way he said it. We both cried.Funny thing was; I knew that he loved me, just like I loved him. As time went on we became much closer; friends and lovers. I would still screw up and pay the price. There was love, respect and genuine caring. Being given a spanking was just something that happened once in a while. In the thinking I’ve done today I think, under those circumstances, I not only wanted spankings but probably cherished them…from Jack.So, that’s the reason why, with a certain guy, I can be one naughty little bitch and, will take my punishment.

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